Phoebe Buffay, one of the six main characters onFriends, is known for many things. There’s her unique behavior, her music, her array of hidden talents, her evil twin, her alter-egos, her comically dark past, and, towards the end of the series, her relationship with her eventual husband, Mike. Of course, one of her most defining traits is her relationship with her friends. Phoebe’s backstory and characterization occasionally change at times, but that doesn’t keep her from making an impression.
Naturally, Phoebe gets some pretty well-known lines from the series' run, some of which she even gets to sing. Phoebe can go from sweet and friendly to utterly ruthless within scenes, meaning her dialogue can go anywhere. She can deliver a scathing insult one second and be the sensible voice of reason the next. At times, she can even do both at once. Being such a unique, colorful character, some of Phoebe’s quotes give viewers a brief glimpse into her psyche.
10"Oh, my God. What am I doing?!"
Before being cast as Phoebe onFriends,Lisa Kudrowwas cast as Ursula the waitress, on the sitcomMad About You. TheFriendsshowrunners decided to be creative about this and established Ursula as Phoebe’s twin sister, with the character appearing in a few episodes of the series. In true sitcom fashion,Ursula is Phoebe’s evil twin. In one of her more infamous actions is in “The One Where Chandler Can’t Cry,” where Ursula starts working as a porn star, using her sister’s name as her stage name.
Phoebe has new “fans” asking for her autograph, with even Gunther having seen the films, but she remains none the wiser. However, her friends manage to get a copy of “Buffay the Vampire Layer,” poking fun at the sisters' surname. Eventually, Rachel recognizes Ursula is the one on screen. Phoebe then enters the scene, sees what the gang is watching, and screams, “Oh, my God. What am I doing?!” Phoebe later gets her revenge when she collects Ursula’s checks, since they’re in her name, as well as embarrassing her new “fans.”
9"Oh, I wish I could, but I don’t want to."
Whether it’s because she’s too innocent-minded or just too kooky, Phoebe often says things people would just think. This is made apparent as early as the series' pilot, also known as “The One Where Monica Gets a Roommate.” While Ross is talking to Rachel, she mentions how she’s missing out on her honeymoon to Aruba by not getting married. Ross asks if she’d like to help him move furniturewith Joey and Chandleras a possible distraction.
Rachel turns him down, saying that she’s had a long day. Granted, even Chandler clearly isn’t too happy about helping, and he’s already agreed to it. Joey then asks Phoebe if she’d like to help. She decides to skip the formalities and excuses, saying, “Oh, I wish I could, but I don’t want to.”
8"They don’t know that we know they know we know."
“The One Where Everybody Finds Out” has Phoebe learn that Chandler and Monica are a couple after seeing them through a window. The friends still can’t openly talk about it, since Ross is none the wiser that his friend and his sister are an item. Still, Joey, whom Chandler and Monica have been forcing to keep their secret with humiliating results, is happy that Rachel and Phoebe could tell the secret couple they know.
Phoebe, on the other hand, decides this is the perfect chance to have some fun with the couple, even flirting with Chandler. However, Monica and Chandler realize what’s going on, causing Chandler to play along, pretending to be receptive to Phoebe’s flirting. Rachel, in turn, sees through this. Things get so complicated, that Phoebe gets the line, “They don’t know that we know they know we know.” In fact, when Phoebe tells Joey not to say anything,he points outhe couldn’t if he wanted to.
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7"You’ll see! You’ll all see!"
“The One With Mac and Cheese” shows Phoebe helping Joey practice his lines. While reciting their lines, Phoebe lets it get to her head and starts overestimating her acting abilities. Even after Joey compliments her, she can’t stop complimenting herself. Phoebe even says she’s better than Joey, who at least has professional experience.
Joey then excuses himself, saying he doesn’t want to rehearse too much. Offended, Phoebe starts screaming, “I don’t need you or anybody else! I’m gonna make it on my own! You’ll see! You’ll all see!” Phoebe even makes sure to gesture dramatically throughout her little speech before she realizes she’s talking to empty air.
6"Ah, Catwoman. So we meet again."
While Phoebe has had a hard life, there are times when she’s proven herself to be very innocent at heart. Thanks to not being allowed to watch sad endings as a kid, she thoughtOld Yellerhad a happy ending. She never picked up on her grandmother’s cookie recipe being Nestlé Toll House. She also suspects that her roommate may be Santa Claus and is shocked and confused when Joey says he doesn’t exist.
“The One with the Halloween Party” sees Monica throw a last-second Halloween party, complete with costumes. Phoebe dresses like Supergirl while Monica dons a Catwoman getup. Phoebe, seemingly getting into character, eyes her friend dressed likea famous feline foe, saying, “Ah, Catwoman. So we meet again.” Monica plays along, saying, “So we do Supergirl.” This confuses Phoebe, who says, “No, it’s me. Phoebe!” The exchange also prefigures Phoebe facing off against an evil foe later in the episode: the return of her twin sister Ursula.
5"Now, if you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer."
ThroughoutFriends, Phoebe has a passion for music, writing songs and performing them at Central Perk. At times, it’s hinted that Phoebe could have a talent for business, at least in its more cut-throat aspects, when she puts her mind to it. When she and Monica worked together to cater a funeral, the widow would’ve emotionally manipulated Monica out of paying had it not been for Phoebe seeing right through it. In an alternate reality, she even had a prominent job at an investment firm, although she ended up losing millions.
“The One with Ross’s Denial” has a brief scene that combines Phoebe’s love for music with her more pragmatic behavior. While at Central Perk, singing about a weird hair she found in her bed, Phoebe bluntly advertises, “Now, if you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.” With the increase in online crowdfunding over the years since the episode, the line could be seen as prophetic of fans supporting their favorite up-and-coming artists.
4"Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say!"
In “The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel,” Ross confesses to Phoebe that he didn’t have his marriage to Rachel annulled, meaning they are still married. Horrified by the situation, Phoebe makes Ross break up with plans with Rachel, even forcing her into a cab, so she can talk to Ross. Ross explains he’s just too ashamed of the fact that he’s been divorced three times, especially at his age, pointing out he doesn’t want his tombstone to read, “Ross Gellar, Three Divorces.”
Phoebe doesn’t accept that explanation, saying, “Don’t be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say!” She adds that he can even have his tombstone read that he was good at marriage if he wants. She even adds, “Y’know? Mine’s gonna say ‘Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive,'” proving her kookiness will live on after she’s gone.
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3"So? They gotta die sometime."
Mike Hannigan starts out as a random Central Perk patron who becomes Phoebe’s last-minute blind date when Joey forgets to arrange one. Despite the strange start and other pitfalls, the two proved to be soulmates and even get married in the penultimate episode. In “The One With Ross’ Inappropriate Song,” Phoebe gets to meet Mike’s parents.
Upon arriving at their home, the already nervous Phoebe realizes how rich they really are. Mike tries to downplay this, saying that his parents are the rich ones, not him. Phoebe pragmatically responds, “So? They gotta die sometime,” at least trying to take the situation in stride. The line also hints at Phoebe’s lack of social graces during the night. The dinner party proves disastrous, with Mike’s parents even trying to match Mike up with another girl. Fortunately, Mike stands by the woman he loves.
2"Because, you see that was an actual problem, and uh, yours is just like y’know a bunch of y’know high school crap…"
A running storyline inFriendsis that Phoebe hasn’t had the easiest life. At the age of 14, after her stepfather went to prison and the death of the woman she thought was her mother, Phoebe was living on the streets. The closest she had to a continuing education at this time was learning French behind a dumpster. At one point, she even mugged a young Ross. Phoebe usually takes this in stride, but she has her moments when she thinks her friends need to read the room.
In “The One with the Worst Best Man Ever,” when Rachel talks about Ross' upcoming wedding to Emily, Phoebe says the situation reminds her of a time, during her years on the streets, when she was asked to trade sex for food. When a confused Rachel asks how they are similar, Phoebe says, “Because, you see that was an actual problem, and uh, yours is just like y’know a bunch of y’know high school crap that nobody really gives y’know…” When Rachel starts to cry, Phoebe shows no sympathy, saying, “Alrighty, here come the waterworks.”
During the story, Phoebe is uncharacteristically cranky thanks to her pregnancy, giving her some plausible deniability, but the line could be read as Phoebe finally saying what she’s been thinking. It also pokes fun at fans who’ve grown tired of Ross and Rachel’s"will they or won’t they"storyline, even as early as the fourth season.
1"Something is wrong with the left phalange."
One running joke about Phoebe is her use of various aliases. For example, there was the time she briefly legally changed her name to “Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock,” with “Valerie” as a nickname. She also went by “Ikea” after being mistaken for a Swede while hiding from Rachel. The most famous of these alter-egos, however, is “Regina Phalange.”
Phoebe poses as “Dr. Phalange” while talking to Emily’s stepmother. She poses as “Regina Phalange” to sneak back into a casino. When claiming to have joined a sorority, she later names “Regina Phalange” as a late acquaintance. At one point, she donned a French accent as “Régine Filange.” The most triumphant use of “Phalange,” however, came in the series finale. Toget Rachel off a plane, Phoebe calls up saying, “Something is wrong with the left phalange.” This causes the plane to be evacuated, allowing Rachel to reunite with Ross, finally giving the couple their happy ending.
